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I can not believe that Cycle Gear said I had a contingent job offer and then said they already had someone else. Its so frustrating trying to find a decent job and I have someone that doesn’t care about my health or me as a person. I have tried to find money and yet I still can not. I want to be able to have fun in life not be stuck here at home wondering just what is my purpose in life.

I need some help with a motorcycle and I keep hoping someday will get better but I’m afraid I will be long gone before that changes. I can not even finish my degree let along have a working vehicle to get around. I do not know why the job market is a slap in someones face and that I can not have an opportunity to succeed. I just sit here applying for jobs like there going out of style and feel that all they really want is nobody. I would do anything to have some help and a chance to work.

I just sit here looking at my bird whose literally the only thing that gives the unconditional love. I look at the people going by on there motorcycles seeing the fun they have while I stay stuck stranded on the side of the road. I wish someone would take the time to not be so selfish.

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I miss the time I have had in Europe even more lately. It’s hard to see the positive outlook when your left to be emotionally hurt and left behind. I can’t do everything on my own as much as I try I need help to make ends meet. The only thing I have that is keeping me going is the Amazon parrot I have and even then there isn’t much left strength I have left to me anymore.

The dark and dreary days are how I feel everyday the clouds are fogging my brain to the point I don’t know what to do. I feel so tired most the time still on the lookout for some way to get some extra money and replace my old vehicle. I have dreams and ambitions and why is it so hard to make some money to do those dreams?

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So I’m bored out of my mind. Trying to figure what I can do to find a source of income. I can only do so much to do the things I want to do. I want to be enjoying the ability to travel places and have a motorcycle that works. I can’t seem to get the thing to actually work right at all and I am soon going to have to sell the vehicle as its causing more trouble then it is worth.

The beautiful weather outside inspire me to keep up hope that things will change and get better. I don’t know how much financial stress I can take anymore I’m scared of the outlook. I’m getting stressed out anticipating this job I am supposed to be getting as I haven’t started it yet. I literally need to start my job ASAP to get things under control and have a better control on my income. I keep looking at the various motorcycles that are in well kept condition wondering when my chance to obtain a vehicle that I can be proud of. I inherit another persons garbage again with this bike I ride right now.

Old is not better as I’m finding there is more and more wrong with this bike. I can’t keep the engine from overheating even with better coolant what gives. I’m worried about not having a reliable bike to get around. I am still pushing for some extra work and hopefully the stress will diminish. I wish I could have someone that would be willing to help with me financing a newer bike so I can get around.

I am out of here for today so can wrap up this philosophy course of doom and work on some of my vacation photos.

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So I been wanting to build a blog and found there is no better time then now. Lately alot of my experiences throughout life have left numerous struggles in which I overcome daily. Its not the easiest life to live trying to obtain a degree with the limited financials I deal with. I feel so close to getting my degree but yet I feel that I am so far away and am in dire need of a miracle to get my last year funded. I felt so good when I had the opportunity to go on a cruise to some very beautiful countries. I long to be able to travel more and more as time pushes on. There is nothing like exploring and its one of the many things I enjoy and share passion for.

Of course there are various other things I enjoy doing and there heavily related to motorcycling lately and of course enjoying the company of the birds that live with me. I get to enjoy there funny and goofy personalities on a daily basis and there are four of them. Two green cheek conures named Tweety and Kiwi and then there is Max the sun conure and Lokie the Yellow-Naped Amazon Parrot. I find myself continuing to want to get more active in various high physical activities lately. If I could I would be out riding more of my motorcycle if only it was actually working in top condition but more than that I lately want to start rock climbing and doing more zip-lining.

Well I am out of here for now and eagerly waiting for some contingent offer of employment to turn into a permanent offer and also my college school year to end. Got to love quarters I have yet to be done with week 7 out of ten.