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Can’t sleep lately I’m having one of those nights. This stress isn’t healthy and I hope today will bring me some good news with my employer. Maybe I’ll be able to return to work for a month until my vacations that are already planned. This could dramatically make a difference to how things go for paying my bills off that I’m barely pushing through on my fixed income. If something dramatically could change I think that time needs to be now as I can only take so much pain. I am tired of fighting for myself to get back to work all for an injury caused by another job. It’s getting boring and haven’t found any other jobs to supplement this mess. Future lies with Lowes to let me return for a month and proceed to let me have the vacation.

I owe so many medical premiums and worried how to pay them. I get scared what will happen to everything in my life can there be a sense of peace. I need something positive to happen since I can only take so much stress at once. I also need my Apple MacBook Pro problem to be resolved from the damaged during shipment. This is the fifth major problem and I wanting replacement this isn’t illogical to ask for but the Apple Executive relations member Jessica Barocio takes the icing of the cake for being the biggest never ending same response over and over again we have no resolution yet at this time you need to wait longer for investigation to be complete. She is like my parrots and also reference her to a broken record.

Humor me why I need take computer to Apple Store when it’s fedex fault for making my life living hell for my laptop. All I wanted was a working computer that wasn’t dropped banged up during shipping and dirty as hell from the new parts put on it. I lost money time and energy on this problem. Let’s see if today’s the day they own up to the problem.

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I am so tired of all this pain and suffering I go through on a day to day basis. I have talked to quite a few people who have a cell and I can not afford the experiences. I have to put up with all the stress and I just sit here trying to figure out what can I do to make more income. This life just constantly throws curve balls at me. I haven’t been able to go back to work for months and there is not much one can do living without extra income. I just want a nice safe place to isolate myself and clear my mind. I wish people wouldn’t try to milk every penny I don’t have just to find something that makes me feel better. I know if I could find the money to get to one of these bondage prisons I would be better off. Everyday I think to myself I just want to be locked into bondage and safe from the world around me. I feel so much better when I locked into various restraints.

Tired of dealing with Apple they won’t fix the laptop that they sent me broken and seems there more about constantly wasting my time. Several repairs later and still no working laptop now hard drive is failing and getting the broken MacBook Pro from Apple during transit with no insurance. This computer was expensive and I shouldn’t be treated like crap. I never had such bad service when comes to the 5 repairs already done they should just replace this unit.

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I keep wondering how I can experience being locked in a jail cell. I would gladly be isolated if I could for most of my life. I’m so tired of dealing with the constant freedom of everyday life and worn out with all my health issues. Worried about so many things especially getting my Apple MacBook Pro repaired. I wish also had the money to have my own cell or even travel to some bondage oriented jails. Is there anyone out there who understands the pain I go through.

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Not much has gone great today at all the useless Apple corporate relations called me to tell me my computer investigation needs to go to another department. Lied to by Apple about my goodwill gesture and blatantly disrespected I wonder what else to expect to get my laptop replaced. Damaged Fedex box and no one cares to rectify the problem. My computer is damaged and I bought a lemon laptop it could take up to when I leave for Switzerland to have it fixed how that make any sense.

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I’m aware now that there are a few people who are bringing me back to life and trying to give me alternatives and even willing to build a prison cell for me as they truly do care about me.i shouldn’t let these opportunities go buy any more as I was stupid to let my dream be ripped beneath my feet. I will have a cell built for me to keep me safe and secured when I need to be. This could make up for bind treating me like an epic piece of shit. Who is he to tell me I’m not worth anything if he has mental problems maybe he should not judge. People who are stable level headed and safe but have moments where they need to reduce stress need to enjoy a cell and lockdown. It’s those people who admit they know what helps that creates a stable person not someone who runs around panicking when it comes to releasing someone. I find that statement full of jokes. I’m hurting because I want to be in a prison cell. I just don’t have the money to go and do it

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I’m scared what did I do by saying I wasn’t ready to move as quickly as I intended the financial outlook isn’t as easy to deal with now. So many emotions run through my head I’m scared what will happen in my life as things proceed on. I will be so frustrated id I screwed the opportunity of a lifetime.

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I’m scared as to if I am making the right decision to move to Rockford as time goes forward I think it’s the best thing. I can do to save my sanity if I don’t do what I feel I should be doing in life I never know what could partake of me. I also feel that if I leave now things would change for the better as I leave once and for all.Switzerland trip arrives in several weeks and I don’t feel like I would like to do the cruise anymore as much as I thought it would be fun I have a feeling I am going to regret going on it should I choose to tell my sir to hold off till late April I’m afraid that my sir would get angry with me.I also had ran into my ex friend who was trying to love me and I shut him down to care about the person I live with now. it was the hardest thing emotionally to me that I could have possibly been in a relationship that could have change my life again. I can’t believe I always deny things as they happen that why I fail so badly at finding what I desire I’m afraid to take a chance and figure what do I have to loose.

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I need to move my four parrots my motorcycle and other personal l asap to move to Rockford.

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No one to help me be in it and no one to place in my chair so empty.

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Another day of hell on Earth least got my prison restraint chair.