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Arrived almost three hours later than planned. Finally got picked up and heading towards the prison. Emotionally I was mostly excited, even when I was getting lead into the building. Eventually was stripped naked, processed through, given a shower, and then given a prison uniform as well as linens. Then came some food and then I took me medications and fell asleep. The whole night as I went to sleep I felt a wave of calm feeling that never has happened for several months. Aside from the last time I had slept overnight in a steel cage or the day I finally arrived to be with my friend in Switzerland. I don’t think I will ever understand why it helps but I finally had more rest than most weeks as of lately. When I finally awoke the next morning I felt safe and secure.

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The tears of pain run down my cheeks as I begin to weep. I fell in pain for what I can’t tell. I’m in need of bondage and prison confinement. There has to be someone who can provide that to me I don’t want all that much but security food and to live in Europe why can’t I.

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So anxious to get flying out soon to my destination towards Geneva, Switzerland. There are so many things I deeply miss in Switzerland and looking forward to the peacefulness that is there. I really needed this vacation as everything has been so hectic in my life. I face so many battles as things go on and I just want to go be nice and secured and in peace. I have so many thoughts of bondage and confinement and having someone who wants me to be apart of their lives. I hope that I will get some rest on this flight and be more rested than I am now. I feel so exhausted physically from work last night and was tossing and turning.

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Nobody care about my opinions and wonder why I am upset. Why is it that someone can take my discount for a deck to be built and not scene consideration to whom haves the initial money to begin with. I want to live in a house where someone one appreciates me for saving them money and making there home look nice by having options I want a home. No one realize this goal is so hard to find.